FRUSTRATION
I really wanted this blog to be an effort in positive creativity, unfortunately following what seemed to be a promising start to the New Year, the rest of the month has taken a steep dive. Frustrations and disappointments have accrued over the past few weeks...for every three steps forward, it feels like I'm taking (or being pushed) five steps back. Even after a wonderful, positive weekend at the beach with some amazing women, I'm finding it very hard to get to a peaceful place. My faith in Hope is definitely shaken right now and a cloud of negativity seems to have descended upon me.
The realization that there are people close to me who are themselves, or others close to them, going through far worse situations is always on my mind. I don't want to be a whiner or adopt a victim mentality, I know I'm much stronger than that! I am grateful for all the great things I have and I don't want to diminish those aspects of my life. For now, it would just be nice for things to get easier.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
January 4
Post Workout Dinner
=====================================================================================
With every drip of sweat
The toxic thoughts of the day disappear
Breathe in, breathe out
The heart is pounding, lungs are stretched
The muscles tense and release
1..2..3..focus
Time ticks by quickly
No room for chaotic perceptions
Pushing through the last repetition
Eyes fixed to a spot on the wall
Counting as a mantra
1..2..3..focus
Monday, January 3, 2011
January 1, 2, 3...
After thinking about this project for over two weeks, I totally missed the start day. Of course, I have the excuse that I was up on the mountain with a very, very slow internet connection. I could beat myself up for not persevering, and feel guilty and just give up before I get started. But that was last year's me, this year's me is just going to get a late start and you'll get three days worth of creativity!
January 1st:
If you look closely, you'll see fireworks exploding above my head. This is how I will live 2011. On New Year's Eve I had a friend send me the following advice and I don't think she will mind me sharing it with you.
1. Give thanks that life is... just as it is (and that it's been... just as it's been). Because of it, you're now "READY."
2. Define what you want in terms of the end result. Don't worry about the hows, or even the course. KNOW that what you want is ALREADY yours in spirit, by divine LAW, just focus on the certainty of this ownership, understand it, claim it, and "it will be on earth, as it is in heaven (spirit)."
3. LET THE UNIVERSE show you the way via your impulses and instincts that appear as you take inspired action. Don't worry that your first steps seem silly or futile. And if you don't know what to do, do anything! Go! Get busy! Do not insist on intermediary successes, only upon the end result.
2011 is going to be your year (it already is)!
January 2:
To me there is something so relaxing about cozying up with someone or someone(s) to watch a movie. Cuddling is an art form and viewing a movie on a comfy sofa is the perfect time to practice. The most important thing to remember are your fuzzy, wuzzy socks :)
January 3:
Back to the grind -- school for Alex, work for me.
Monday's after Holidays seem the hardest to get started. When you really dislike your job, it makes it that much more difficult. However, today I focused on the things I do like and the opportunities that are appearing in my life every day. I thought about my first training run for the marathon I will be running this year; I thought about organizing my cute little office/ craft room space in the house I love; I thought about the possibilities that are all within my choices. As the day progressed, I realized how much more at peace I had become.
January 1st:
If you look closely, you'll see fireworks exploding above my head. This is how I will live 2011. On New Year's Eve I had a friend send me the following advice and I don't think she will mind me sharing it with you.
1. Give thanks that life is... just as it is (and that it's been... just as it's been). Because of it, you're now "READY."
2. Define what you want in terms of the end result. Don't worry about the hows, or even the course. KNOW that what you want is ALREADY yours in spirit, by divine LAW, just focus on the certainty of this ownership, understand it, claim it, and "it will be on earth, as it is in heaven (spirit)."
3. LET THE UNIVERSE show you the way via your impulses and instincts that appear as you take inspired action. Don't worry that your first steps seem silly or futile. And if you don't know what to do, do anything! Go! Get busy! Do not insist on intermediary successes, only upon the end result.
2011 is going to be your year (it already is)!
January 2:
To me there is something so relaxing about cozying up with someone or someone(s) to watch a movie. Cuddling is an art form and viewing a movie on a comfy sofa is the perfect time to practice. The most important thing to remember are your fuzzy, wuzzy socks :)
January 3:
Back to the grind -- school for Alex, work for me.
Monday's after Holidays seem the hardest to get started. When you really dislike your job, it makes it that much more difficult. However, today I focused on the things I do like and the opportunities that are appearing in my life every day. I thought about my first training run for the marathon I will be running this year; I thought about organizing my cute little office/ craft room space in the house I love; I thought about the possibilities that are all within my choices. As the day progressed, I realized how much more at peace I had become.
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